Before getting back on to Vince’s motorcycle, we talked
about what we should do next. I told him I wanted to see the Nongnooch Tropical
Garden that is suppose to have elephant rides and Bengal Tigers which you are
able to handle. I also mentioned I wanted to try some authentic Thai food. He
said that there are dozens of little food shacks along the way to the tropical
garden so we could just stop in at any random one we see and it should be
really good.
We sped off
into the dirty Pattaya roads and made our way in the direction of the tropical
garden. Riding on the main highway, I notice all the exotic eastern looking architecture
mixed with modern style building. On one side of the street you can have a
massive, golden Buddhist temple and on the other side you could have a 3-story
Samsung retail building. A true meeting of east meets west.
The main city gave way to smaller
businesses and restaurants. Vince found a small food shack off the side of the
road and pulls over to the side. After taking off our helmets and re-adjusting
our messy hair, we walked into the outdoor food shack. There were about 5
wooden picnic tables that we could sit on and right next to them was the
“kitchen” which was no more than a cutting block, a stove and a griddle. We sat
down and Vince asked what I wanted to try. The menu was entirely in Thai with
zero English but luckily Vince spoke a little Thai. I told him I wanted to try
something spicy like Spicy Mint Chicken or something similar with a little kick.
He luckily knew how to say that in Thai so he went ahead and ordered for me. He
quickly turned to me and asked how well I could handle spice. I replied to him
that I could hold my own pretty well. He returned to the lady at the kitchen
(which was about 5 feet from our table) and finished ordering. I looked around
and saw a few locals eating near us. The food they had looked pretty good so I
figured we were in for something good.
As we waited for our food, we
chatted some more about music and guitar. He explained that the jazz scene in
Pattaya wasn’t so good but there were a few guys in town who were ok. An
Italian friend of his plays solo jazz guitar pretty well he said and if their
was time, he’d like to introduce me to him and possibly jam. It sounded fun so
I told him that I would love to if we had time.
We were then interrupted with our
food. The nice woman set our food down in front of us. As she set mine down,
Vince realized that he had mis-ordered and got me Spicy Basil Chicken instead.
I could smell the delicious spices from the dish and told him I didn’t mind
eating it. I took the first bite and the flavor made my mouth implode. It was
like every millimeter of the inside of my mouth wanted to suck its self in and
absorb all the exotic flavors of every bite. It was what I was looking for. The
spice level at first didn’t seem so bad but as I got about half way through the
meal, it started to catch up with me. I started sweating and my face became
flush. I thought that if it was just a little spicier, I wouldn’t be able to
eat it. It wasn’t so I managed to finish the whole thing and the inside of my
mouth afterwards was tingling.
Vince was nice enough to pay the
bill (which for both of us with Coke’s was about $3) and then we headed off
into the tropical garden. The garden was off the beaten track a little bit but
it was nice to get out of the main city and out in the “boonies”, as Vince said
for a while. After about 20 minutes on the road, we get to the front entrance.
We hang a left and drive down this beautifully landscaped road. On either side
we could see nurseries where they were growing several different types of Palm
trees and other plants. As we road further, the landscape flattened out and I
could see large green mountains in the distance. It reminded me of all the Thai
paintings you see in most Thai food restaurants in the US. This however, was
the real deal and it was exciting to see it in person.
We pulled up to the front gate and
the guy who walked from the main hut to us asked for 450 Baht (about $15) in
perfect English. Vince asked him a few questions and it turns out the guy went
to college in Ohio and his and Vince’s alma matters were rivals so they joked
football. He then asked Vince if he had a Thai drivers license. Vince said that
he did but he would have to get off his seat and open it up to get it. The guy
said that he believed him and dropped his price for Vince to 80 Baht. We paid
our admission and drove inside.
After driving in circles we found a
parking spot and made our way into the park. As we tried looking at the map of
the park we got confused by the poor layout of the map and ended up outside the
park again. After stopping for a minute and finding our way back to the main
road, we finally made it to where they kept the elephants.
As soon as we made it to the
elephant pen, one of the large beasts mounted one of the females and started
thrusting. It sort of made it an awkward moment for both of us and I figured
the only way to save the moment was to take out my camera and start taking
photos National Geographic style.
Once they were finished we made our
way into the center of the park. I managed to find the booth where they sold
tickets for elephant rides and paid my 450 Baht fee. They sent me to this
elevated booth where they brought an elephant with a seat mounted to the top. I
carefully got in and threw my camera to Vince. There was a driver who was
sitting on his neck of the gentle beast who gently nudged the back of his hear
with his sandled foot. We started to move slowly as the animal isn’t really
known for its speed.
We waddled through the park and
everyone looked and waved at me. I smiled and waved back at them. It sort of
made you feel like a kind riding an elephant by all these short Thai people.
We rode a few blocks and turned
around. The elephant moved very slowly which sort of made a fast walker like
myself kind of impatient. But what it lacked in speed, it truly lacked in
comfort. The elephant waddles so much and the seat moves around in every direction,
which made for an uncomfortable ride. I guess they are probably good for mowing
through thick jungle but in the city, I might want to stick with a car.
The driver took me back to the
booth and I got down. Before I got off the seat I reached down and petted the
elephants back. It had very thick skin, which almost felt like toned muscles
all over. It had long thin black hairs that grew off the skin about 4 inches.
It was different than what I had imagined but was still cool to pet one.
I after getting down, the final
thing I wanted to do was take a picture with a Bengal Tiger. Their website
promoted taking a picture with Tigers and also feeding little tiger cubs. After
looking at the poorly drawn map again and taking more wrong turns, we found the
“Animal Zoo”. We walked by some birds and emu looking birds till we finally got
to the section with the Tigers.
The Tiger was chained to an
elevated concrete slab about 3 feet off the ground. The chain its self was
maybe 3 feet also so it was barely able to stand on its feet. Several people
crowded around the scared animal. His eyes were wide open and definitely afraid
of all the people surrounding him. I have been to several zoos in the past but
this for me was crossing the line. This would have never flown in the states.
This animal was being mistreated and deserved better than to be chained to a
slab and gawked at. Whenever one of the spectators would try to get too close,
he would get up and growl and take a swipe at him. There was no protection for
the spectators besides that chain attached to the Tiger’s neck so if you got
too close and didn’t watch what you were doing, the Tiger could easily grab you
and I would imagine slice you open.
I approached the tiger slowly as to
try not to frighten him. I got as close to him as I thought was safe which was
about 5 feet from him. I got my camera out and snapped a few photos of him
(with the flash off of course) and took a minute to admire him. It very much
reminded me of a larger version of any house cat. One that you could potentially
have hanging out on your couch at home and watch reruns of House M.D. with. The
kind that scratches the shit out of your couch and you have to tell it “NO!’ at
as it scurries and hides in it’s favorite hiding place. Just as I was thinking
this, another person got too close to the Tiger and he took a swipe at him with
his large paws which came about 6 inches from this guy’s face. I then came back
to my senses. This is no domestic cat. This is a wild animal and he doesn’t see
us as couch buddies, he sees us as intruders and dinner.
One of the guys who worked at the
Zoo came over and asked if I wanted to take a picture with the Tiger. “It’s
only 150 Baht!” he said. I thought this guy had to be fucking joking. This
Tiger was ready to maul somebody and he thought I was dumb enough to PAY him to
go close enough to this tiger where he would surely eat my face. I laughed and
politely told him no. I think my life is worth a little more than 150 Baht.
Looking at my wristwatch, I
realized we were quickly running out of time. We went back to the motorcycle
and stopped by the Bali Hai Pier where we got a last minute Thai meal at a
quaint outdoor restaurant. We got some amazing coconut red curry and fried rice
and spent maybe 2 dollars on the entire meal. We finished and realized that I
only had 30 minutes to be back to the ship! We paid our bill and hit the road.
We flew down the highway at illegal
speeds. We had to be going about 65 mph down this city street. I looked down at
his speedometer that was apparently broken since I figured we were going faster
than zero miles per hour. My panic started to creep up on me again and I just
closed my eyes and concentrated on my breathing. When I opened my eyes, I saw
signs for the port. I carefully took my left hand off the now slippery metal
handle behind me and looked at my watch. It said we had 15 minutes left to get
back to the ship. Vince charged down these streets, blowing off red lights as
we go.
We finally made it back to the ship with 4
minutes to spare. I take off my helmet and thanked him for every thing. Vince
proved to be a good host and I told him next time I come back to Thailand, I’ll
look him up. He said it was his pleasure and that next time he’ll show me more
of the local hangouts. I rushed back to the ship and barely made it in time.
Thinking back, I realized we covered a lot of ground and realized that it was
probably the most fun day I’ve had on my whole contract. Tomorrow we were
shipping out for Ko Samui. I hoped I was going to has as much fun… -DB
 |
| Grumpy cat. |
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